Chuck and Huck

Former martial arts champion Chuck Norris may not be known for his incredible range and versatility as an actor, but the man does have a sense of humor, and he doesn't take himself too seriously. Say what you will about his acting ability or lack thereof, he has played a consistent character all along. If you see something with Chuck Norris in it, you know he will be the even-tempered good guy who will not back down from a fight when necessary, usually utilizing his famous roundhouse karate kick. He doesn't try to do comedy like Jackie Chan, or "sensitive," roles like Mel Gibson or Clint Eastwood. Nope, Chuck knows his limitations: He's the strong, silent type. And he has parlayed those qualities into a long-lasting career.

Chuck Norris' last t.v. series, "Walker, Texas Ranger" left the regular weekly schedule in 2001. But because of his never-changing, stoic countenance, he turned into something of a pop culture icon. Late-night talk show host Conan O'Brien started it, inserting clips of "Walker" into his show for comic relief. From there, a couple of internet geeks put up a website listing a number of Chuck Norris "facts." They're all hilarious exaggerations of Norris' uber- tough-guy image, such as:

Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.

Or...

Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Hell was That?"

Or...

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

You get the idea. The website and number of "facts" started off small, but like many internet phenomenons it has grown inexplicably large. The list has been continually updated and revised since it first appeared in 2005 and there are hundreds now. Some of them are lame, but many are so absurd they will make you laugh out loud.

Okay, one more...

Death once had a near-Chuck Norris experience.

Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet who can kick you in the back of the face."

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he needs.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

Well-grounded and down-to-earth, Chuck takes the ribbing in stride. In fact, he responded to it with characteristic good-nature on the World Net Daily website, to which he is a regular contributor.

Chuck Norris is an unashamed Christian and also a good Republican.

Republican Presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has shown himself to be most glib and at-ease in front of crowds and t.v. cameras. He comes across as very "real" or at least less-fake and scripted than any politician I've seen in a long, long time (with the exception of the latter-day Bill Clinton). Like Chuck Norris, Huckabee apparently does not take himself too seriously either. Check out this ad, which we bring to you courtesy of the good folks at YouTube.

Okay, so this Huckabee has a sense of humor. I like that. Our current President's attempts at humor are...let's fact it, painful. It is wise of Huckabee to align himself with such a bad-ass icon as Chuck Norris. That swaggering tough-guy image worked for Ronald Reagan, and you have to admit that George W. Bush has played up his Texas roots for all it's worth. Americans love cowboys. Even modern-day cowboys who drive SUV's instead of ride horses (but it doesn't hurt to have some photo-ops of you actually on a horse once in a while).

But there's more to a President than a sense of humor and some clever one-liners. Where does Huckabee stand on other important issues? Like the question of faith. Politicians are good at side-stepping or evading sensitive questions like this. Not Huckabee!

They were trying to box Huckabee into a corner. Wolf Blizter tried to nail him down on a meaningless technicality, trying to get Huckabee to say that he believes the earth was created in seven "days" as we know them now.

Huckabee wasn't having any of it. He was obviously prepared for the question, and his response sounded well-rehearsed. Still, I liked it. I liked when he said, "I'll tell you what I'll tell this country. If they want a President who doesn't believe in God there's probably plenty of choices. But if I'm selected as President of this country, they'll have one who believes in those words, that God did create."

I hadn't really thought that the Republicans were fielding anybody worthwhile in this election. But I'm getting tired of Hillary's non-answers or rambling talking-point evasions. Now I'm going to have to take a closer look at Governor Huckabee.

LINKS:

Official Chuck Norris website
Chuck Norris "Facts"
Chuck Norris Official Response
Chuck Norris Wikipedia