More Spears Family Drama

Yes, I own a television, but I do not have cable. I get one local channel and a PBS station. When I got back from Honduras I decided that there was just nothing on t.v. that I wanted to see anymore. I'm tired of all the "reality" shows and "crime scene" shows. And just how many "Law and Orders" are there? I guess I'm just burned-out on tv. So now I get my media fix almost exclusively from the internet.

We've been up here at the hunting camp for the past week or so. I could have gone back home after dropping the Boss off, but as long as he's here with a hunting party, I'd feel really, really badly if someone got hurt and the helicopter was not available to take them to a hospital. We are waaaaaaay out in the woods here. Since I'm not really a hunter (oh yeah, I fit in well with this crowd...not!) I get to hang around the camp house most of the time...watching television. My stupid laptop - my stupid, stupid laptop has picked this time to crap out on me.

Just as you should probably not buy a gun from a shady guy on a streetcorner, you probably shouldn't buy a used laptop either. I need a laptop mainly for writing, email and checking my various aviation newsgroups. I'm not a gamer and I really don't need any fancy programs or features. Just give me a laptop that has a built-in wireless modem and I'm all set.

A not-so-shady friend had just such a computer for sale, cheap. It had been issued to the former owner by a defunct corporation that never asked for it back. Catch was, Windows was password-protected. Try as we might, we could not delete that function. I tried to re-install Windows XP on the thing, but it wouldn't even let me do that without Administrator authority. Okay, no problem, not as long as I remembered my friend's very easy password.

...Until it stopped working. First day I was up here at the camp this week, just like that, entering the password only brought up an error message. What the...? I tried and tried, using every variation and alternate password I could think of. No dice, the computer remains locked up tight. Useless.

There is one other computer here at the camp, but it's the Boss's and my access to it is very limited. Which leaves me few options. I picked up a Michael Crichton novel ("Airframe") and finished it in one marathon day of reading (not his best work, in my opinion). I've read and re-read every aviation magazine and the two Rolling Stone's I brought with me. That left the t.v.

Apparently, nothing of importance happens in this country. Yesterday there were three main stories: The Iowa caucuses, the missing hiker in north Georgia, and Britney Spears breakdown. Over and over and over those three stories were aired. And it didn't matter whether you watched Faux News or CNN.

Last week it was her younger sister, Jamie Lynn. This week it's Britney. Today (Saturday) they are still fascinated with her. And I wonder, why do we care? I certainly don't. Yet everywhere this poor woman goes, scads of photographers follow, documenting her every burp. On the night of her "breakdown," helicopters with bright searchlights turned her house to daylight.

CNN did a big story on the possible causes of Britney's bizarre behavior of late (all of it reported as "news" by CNN, of course). They trotted out some psychiatrist who offered her supposedly knowledgable opinion, as they always do. With absolute seriousness and not the slightest bit of irony, the reporter concluded that perhaps Britney should just take some time off and out of the spotlight.

Statements like this always make me knock my hand against the side of my head and go, "Huh? Did I just hear that right?" I felt like screaming at the t.v., "JUST HOW IS SHE SUPPOSED TO DO THAT WHEN CNN CAMERAS FOLLOW HER AROUND EVERY MINUTE OF THE DAY?!"

I've got the perfect suggestion for Britney: Move to Guanaja! For that is what I feel like doing after a couple of days of being subjected to the American media and the pure unadulterated crap it puts out.

I'm about to go crazy up here. Fortunately, I think I'm also going home today. First stop will be Best Buy or Circuit City for a new, unpassword-protected laptop. God, spare me from having to watch any more lousy American television! On second thought, maybe I will take up hunting. But not deer, oh no! My form of hunting will be different. No television set in the country would be safe...