Who Am I?

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A nobody; a nitwit; a pilot; a motorcyclist; a raconteur; a lover...of life - who loves to laugh, who tries to not take myself (or anything) too seriously...just a normal guy who knows his place in the universe by being in touch with my spiritual side. What more is there?

20 October 2009

Balloon Boy

It’s not that I’m clairvoyant, but I am a big ol’ skeptic. I figured something was up. I mean, it didn't take a geeeeeenius to see through this one. And who names their kid “Falcon” anyway?

First we heard the alarming news that some sort of helium balloon...kind of a homemade flying saucer...had gotten loose from somebody's backyard in Colorado and there might be a boy inside it. Dear God! Edge-of-seat stuff! Another national emergency of the “baby falls down well” type we seem to do so well. News helicopters circled military helicopters who could only stand-by and do…well...nothing but watch with the rest of us.

Shortly thereafter the craft came down and lo and behold, no boy in the balloon. Did he fall out? Dear God! We were on the edge of our seats yet again. Turned out he’d been hiding in the attic over the garage all along, they said. Next, we heard that the parents had been on ABC-TV’s “Wife Swap” show.


And that they were now "storm chasers."

Publicity stunt, said I.

And that’s all it was.

The sad thing is that the boy, already saddled with the unfortunate moniker, “Falcon” will now and forever be known as “Balloon Boy.” Just say those words and everyone knows who/what you’re talking about. Ain’t the media wonderful!

My youngest sister Eleanor tweeted, “Developing…Jon Gosselin to adopt Balloon Boy in advance of new poor parenting reality show.” I thought it was funny.

But seriously, who names their kid, “Falcon,” anyway?


Redlefty said...

The two best "funny but oh so wrong" jokes I've heard so far about the story:

1) Kanye West went to Falcon and said "Hey balloon boy, I'm really happy for you and Imma let you finish, but Anne Frank had the best attic hideout of all time! OF ALL TIME!!"

2) The balloon episode wasn't a sham at all -- Michael Jackson had ordered takeout.

Like I said, oh so wrong.

Stan said...

I was in an Army attack helicopter unit with a pilot who had named his son "Maverick". Yes, that was the name on the poor kid's birth certificate; and yes, the dad was a huge Top Gun fan.

I'm sure the poor kid is in therapy now.

Bob said...

You're right, didn't take a genius to think, hmmmmmm, something not right here. Of course, I wanted to believe that the guy wouldn't put his son up to something like that. And I hate to stereotype but, when I heard about "Wife Swap" I immediately had my doubts.

La Gringa said...

Very funny. I just knew it was fake, too. It was just too weird. If you ever get to see the video of the family interview again (watch CNN, they will show it 500 more times) -- watch out the other boys faces. Poor kids. They knew they were putting one over on everyone and seemed a little embarrassed about it.