Who Am I?

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A nobody; a nitwit; a pilot; a motorcyclist; a raconteur; a lover...of life - who loves to laugh, who tries to not take myself (or anything) too seriously...just a normal guy who knows his place in the universe by being in touch with my spiritual side. What more is there?

26 August 2010

David Thorne: Certified Lunatic

I have mentioned before how much I love David Thorne’s blog, 27b/6 . While reading his post, “1,000 Characters” the other night and I was laughing so hard I just about fell out of my chair. There’s a lot of random stuff in the post, but these two items really stood out. Why can't I have a sense of humor as good as this guy's?

Girls That have said no Part 1

Around the time I was twelve, my sister had really hot friends staying over. I would dress in ninja gear and wriggle 'saving private ryan beach commando style' into her bedroom and listen to their conversations. Some were educational, most were inane. A few months ago, I was standing in a cd store and a girl came up to me and said "Are you David?" to which I replied "It depends" (and immediately regretted as I knew that if she asked me 'depends on what', I had nothing). The fear must have shown because she asked "Depends on what?" and I replied like a retard "On whether it is on or off the record, I have been misquoted by you people before." and she looked at me as if I was a retard before telling me that she had been a friend of my sisters and remembered me and then actually asked "Are you still annoying?" so I asked her if she still "squeezed her nipples while thinking about kissing Michael Wilson". After a pretty long pause I asked her out but she said no.

And from the same post…

Girls that said no, Part 3

While working at a horse riding camp several years ago, I spent a good twenty minutes explaining to a group, which consisted of twelve children and their young teacher, the importance of horse safety before walking behind a horse and being kicked in the head. I recall only walking in a zigag back to the house with the muffled sounds of children screaming in the background before collapsing and waking up in hospital. While I was there, with a fractured skull, the teacher bought me in a get well soon card signed by all the children so I asked her out but she said no.

David Thorne has a book out, naturally. It is called, “The Internet Is a Playground.” In the (obviously faked) interview below, David starts off by describing an episode he had with his friend "Lucius" - you'd have to read his blog to find out who (and what) Lucius is.

I would imagine that Oprah has got the lawsuit in the works as we speak.

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